Where it’s at …

The last week flew by so quickly that I hardly recognised my ass from my elbow most of the time! I’d spring out of bed gazelle like in the mornings (well okay not QUITE that gracefully!) but I have made a point of getting up earlier on “school days” to sort out breakfast for the kids and get their packed lunches ready … then I even found I actually had time to sit down with a cup of coffee and catch some news before making sure that they were dressed and ready for school. On more than one occasion I actually had time to (shhhh don’t tell anyone!) SHOWER before the morning school run!

Soooo I need to make a bit of an update on the last week and where I’m at with the business, especially because I’ve had my customers commenting asking me what on earth has been going on because the website is down!! I have to say, it puts a huge smile on my face to know that customers have commented on my blog and searched me out on facebook! It’s actually nice to have been missed!!

DeeLights is still very much in business!

The plug has most definitely NOT been pulled and I am still alive and kicking. All the while my heart is beating … in my heart I will always be a candlemaker! It’s what I do!! It’s all I do and what I am GOOD at!! Crikey if my customers are actually LOOKING for me online when the business website is down … well that says it all about the quality huh!

Timing has been VERY unfortunate with the run up to Christmas, but I’ve not had much choice. Well okay that’s a lie, there is always a choice, but I know I made the right choice.

I took time OUT from the business to settle my children into a new home after leaving their father and all they have ever known for their short little lives. I had a brand spanking new home to set up and my priorities had to be re-focused 100% onto my children. It was absolutely essential that I wasn’t stressing out about filling orders or having them looked after in the evenings while I was working because they have needed me waaaaay more than any customer.

The website IS down at the moment but that’s only because I am in the middle of transferring hosts, and it should be back up and running again soon! In the meantime I’ll be getting the eBay shop stocked asap over the next day or so. I’ll update here when there is news to tell anyway!

My ex and I seem to be getting on okay as well. There have been a few “dodgy” moments where we’ve yelled and screamed at each other, but for the most part it’s all on good terms and the children are being put first which is what matters.

As to my new life in “single-ville” and the business relocation and new premises and everything ELSE that has happened … I will have to save that for another day because as Zebedee would say – “time for bed ….”

Good Friends …

While I was “married” … I know I let a lot of friendships slide and I’ll take full responsibility for that. It was so easy to settle into “normal” life and use the excuse of being busy … when really all it would have taken is a phone call, email or text to stay in touch. It takes two yes … but if neither of you make the effort – then, well one of you has to!

Since I’ve been “single” I have been back in touch with so many friends and I am absolutely loving it!! I tell ya, Facebook has a lot to answer to! I’ve got online friends that I “met” a few years ago through various forums and networking sites and lost contact with, as well as people I haven’t spoken to in over 18 years that I went to school with!!! My social circle has widened so much and I am loving it!!

I’m determined to stay on top of my friendships from now on. Everyone needs a venting post and someone to laugh, cry and smile with them. My friends have really been there for me – I’m really lucky!

Marriage & Divorce

After nearly 11 years of marriage, my husband and I are getting a divorce. The funny part is that our friends were very much split down the middle when they found out … half of them were shocked that the two of us were splitting up, but the other half weren’t surprised at all. It’s amazing what gets hidden behind closed doors huh.

It has to be said that Megan & Nathan are handling it REALLY well. I am so proud of them. I found a lovely 3 bed house to rent in the same area as the “old house” and a terrific landlady to boot! I had said to Hub that we should wait to tell them the whole truth until I had found a place because it would make the adjustment easier if they could go and SEE where they were going to be living, and it worked out perfectly. I found the house at the start of October, and moved in with the children officially on the 25th. It meant that I was able to spend three whole weeks getting unpacked and getting the house sorted out before “the big day.” The first week in the house the children were on half term as well, so we all had plenty of time to adjust and get used to things. There have been a few problems … but on the whole they have done brilliantly and settled in really well. I’m really proud of both of them.

It hasn’t been easy and I won’t pretend otherwise! I worry every day about money and coping… but so far I’m doing okay. I live to a very strict budget and have precisely £7.68 a week left over, but that includes everything!! Housing benefit *should* cover my rent, but I have to make sure I can cover at least HALF of it every month just incase there is a problem (I am a grey area as I am self employed!) BUT … my budget is worked out to include all of the bills – gas & electric (both key meters), water, TV license, car insurance, phone bill, sky TV, fuel … plus an allowance for food, cigarettes and alcohol! My budget also includes a tenner a week “unexpected” … like last week the kids bought home school photos … more money! So far, it’s working out, but I need to live for about 3 months to really tell for sure and it’s only been a couple of weeks so far! 

My soon-to-be-ex-husband and I are getting on okay too. We are polite and civil to each other and there is a new respect that there never was before. Shame that wasn’t the case while we were still “married” eh! Anyway it’s working out that he is seeing the kids one night a week during the week and then he has them 2 nights every other weekend … they feel they see enough of him, and he seems happy that he is seeing enough of them … so it’s all good.

Our solicitors seem to think it will take anywhere between 3-5 months for the divorce. I am divorcing him on the grounds of “unreasonable behaviour” but to keep it amicable, it’s basically things we agreed on between us, so there are no surprises and no nasty malicious anything … well not from my part anyway and I’ve not seen anything to indicate that he’s about to pull a swift one on me. Basically we both just want a clean break and a fresh start.

*** HIATUS ***

“Hiatus” –noun, plural -tus⋅es, -tus.

1.	a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series, action, etc.

Yeah … so that’s what this has been … a hiatus! I had to stop writing my blog for a while when my marriage really started to break down because my kids read this and until my husband and I had a chance to work out exactly what we were going to do and talk to them properly … well I couldn’t write about it … and as my life was so pre-occupied with that … I couldn’t write about anything else either!!

Part of me was going to start a completely new blog with a new address and everything, but instead I decided to just carry on here

So … Will Work For Shoes is back … with a vengeance!!