Where it’s at …

24 11 2008

The last week flew by so quickly that I hardly recognised my ass from my elbow most of the time! I’d spring out of bed gazelle like in the mornings (well okay not QUITE that gracefully!) but I have made a point of getting up earlier on “school days” to sort out breakfast for the kids and get their packed lunches ready … then I even found I actually had time to sit down with a cup of coffee and catch some news before making sure that they were dressed and ready for school. On more than one occasion I actually had time to (shhhh don’t tell anyone!) SHOWER before the morning school run!

Soooo I need to make a bit of an update on the last week and where I’m at with the business, especially because I’ve had my customers commenting asking me what on earth has been going on because the website is down!! I have to say, it puts a huge smile on my face to know that customers have commented on my blog and searched me out on facebook! It’s actually nice to have been missed!!

DeeLights is still very much in business!

The plug has most definitely NOT been pulled and I am still alive and kicking. All the while my heart is beating … in my heart I will always be a candlemaker! It’s what I do!! It’s all I do and what I am GOOD at!! Crikey if my customers are actually LOOKING for me online when the business website is down … well that says it all about the quality huh!

Timing has been VERY unfortunate with the run up to Christmas, but I’ve not had much choice. Well okay that’s a lie, there is always a choice, but I know I made the right choice.

I took time OUT from the business to settle my children into a new home after leaving their father and all they have ever known for their short little lives. I had a brand spanking new home to set up and my priorities had to be re-focused 100% onto my children. It was absolutely essential that I wasn’t stressing out about filling orders or having them looked after in the evenings while I was working because they have needed me waaaaay more than any customer.

The website IS down at the moment but that’s only because I am in the middle of transferring hosts, and it should be back up and running again soon! In the meantime I’ll be getting the eBay shop stocked asap over the next day or so. I’ll update here when there is news to tell anyway!

My ex and I seem to be getting on okay as well. There have been a few “dodgy” moments where we’ve yelled and screamed at each other, but for the most part it’s all on good terms and the children are being put first which is what matters.

As to my new life in “single-ville” and the business relocation and new premises and everything ELSE that has happened … I will have to save that for another day because as Zebedee would say – “time for bed ….”


Good Friends …

14 11 2008

While I was “married” … I know I let a lot of friendships slide and I’ll take full responsibility for that. It was so easy to settle into “normal” life and use the excuse of being busy … when really all it would have taken is a phone call, email or text to stay in touch. It takes two yes … but if neither of you make the effort – then, well one of you has to!

Since I’ve been “single” I have been back in touch with so many friends and I am absolutely loving it!! I tell ya, Facebook has a lot to answer to! I’ve got online friends that I “met” a few years ago through various forums and networking sites and lost contact with, as well as people I haven’t spoken to in over 18 years that I went to school with!!! My social circle has widened so much and I am loving it!!

I’m determined to stay on top of my friendships from now on. Everyone needs a venting post and someone to laugh, cry and smile with them. My friends have really been there for me – I’m really lucky!

Marriage & Divorce

13 11 2008

After nearly 11 years of marriage, my husband and I are getting a divorce. The funny part is that our friends were very much split down the middle when they found out … half of them were shocked that the two of us were splitting up, but the other half weren’t surprised at all. It’s amazing what gets hidden behind closed doors huh.

It has to be said that Megan & Nathan are handling it REALLY well. I am so proud of them. I found a lovely 3 bed house to rent in the same area as the “old house” and a terrific landlady to boot! I had said to Hub that we should wait to tell them the whole truth until I had found a place because it would make the adjustment easier if they could go and SEE where they were going to be living, and it worked out perfectly. I found the house at the start of October, and moved in with the children officially on the 25th. It meant that I was able to spend three whole weeks getting unpacked and getting the house sorted out before “the big day.” The first week in the house the children were on half term as well, so we all had plenty of time to adjust and get used to things. There have been a few problems … but on the whole they have done brilliantly and settled in really well. I’m really proud of both of them.

It hasn’t been easy and I won’t pretend otherwise! I worry every day about money and coping… but so far I’m doing okay. I live to a very strict budget and have precisely £7.68 a week left over, but that includes everything!! Housing benefit *should* cover my rent, but I have to make sure I can cover at least HALF of it every month just incase there is a problem (I am a grey area as I am self employed!) BUT … my budget is worked out to include all of the bills – gas & electric (both key meters), water, TV license, car insurance, phone bill, sky TV, fuel … plus an allowance for food, cigarettes and alcohol! My budget also includes a tenner a week “unexpected” … like last week the kids bought home school photos … more money! So far, it’s working out, but I need to live for about 3 months to really tell for sure and it’s only been a couple of weeks so far! 

My soon-to-be-ex-husband and I are getting on okay too. We are polite and civil to each other and there is a new respect that there never was before. Shame that wasn’t the case while we were still “married” eh! Anyway it’s working out that he is seeing the kids one night a week during the week and then he has them 2 nights every other weekend … they feel they see enough of him, and he seems happy that he is seeing enough of them … so it’s all good.

Our solicitors seem to think it will take anywhere between 3-5 months for the divorce. I am divorcing him on the grounds of “unreasonable behaviour” but to keep it amicable, it’s basically things we agreed on between us, so there are no surprises and no nasty malicious anything … well not from my part anyway and I’ve not seen anything to indicate that he’s about to pull a swift one on me. Basically we both just want a clean break and a fresh start.

*** HIATUS ***

13 11 2008

“Hiatus” –noun, plural -tus⋅es, -tus.

1. a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series, action, etc.

Yeah … so that’s what this has been … a hiatus! I had to stop writing my blog for a while when my marriage really started to break down because my kids read this and until my husband and I had a chance to work out exactly what we were going to do and talk to them properly … well I couldn’t write about it … and as my life was so pre-occupied with that … I couldn’t write about anything else either!!

Part of me was going to start a completely new blog with a new address and everything, but instead I decided to just carry on here 🙂

So … Will Work For Shoes is back … with a vengeance!!

Ready for 5am … again!

6 09 2008

Sooo after working my proverbial behind off for the last few days, I REALLY hope that the weather holds off for me to have a good day at Ford market tomorrow! The forecast is for rain … lots and lots of rain, but with clear intervals so I’m gonna suck it and see – my alarm is set for 5am and I’m going anyway! I’m happy enough that I went up there a couple of weeks ago when it wasn’t just rain and wind but thunderstorms … and there were still people walking around the market. At any rate it’s got to be better than Worthing market on a Wednesday!!!

I made the most of my oh so comfortable bed until gone 10am this morning. I was fully aware that with the kids back at school and Ford Market on Sundays now … that Saturday morning is literally my ONLY chance to enjoy the sanctuary of my bed – and ohhhh I took advantage of it this morning. It was almost delicious waking up at 8am, looking at the clock with a smile and pulling the duvet back around me and snuggling in deep for another couple of hours snoozing!!!

I’ve had SUCH a good day today and got so much done. It’s always a good day in the workshop for me when I can be productive!! I was a lean mean packaging machine and pretty much spent the day solidly shrink wrapping and labelling votives! LOL I don’t have nearly enough stock for tomorrow, but I also know that I ALWAYS think that no matter how much I take! Megan is coming with me too … I didn’t know until today when I’d got the car packed up whether there would actually be room for her or not … so I’ll have to see how it all goes and if I do sell a lot … then I’ll have to sacrifice my daughter in the car in favour of more stock! LOL

I SO want a van to cart all my crap clutter stock in! This is a Vauxhall combo van and I know I can get one for £500 cash from “the van man” near my workshop. I just don’t have £500! Grrrrrrr

They are SO adorable … ever heard a van described as cute? Well this is it! I love these vans! They are CUTE and the perfect size. They aren’t massively huge, so I’d be able to drive one without being paranoid about crashing it or pissing my neighbours off too much with taking up lots of space in the road! I can just see this with my company logo all over the side of it … permanent advertising for the business.

I love days like this. Work … well, I had a big smile on my face – I’ve still got a smile on my face for reasons I can’t possibly write about *grin* and I’m hoping & praying that the weather is on my side tomorrow!!!

Apparently “perfect”?!

5 09 2008

I’ve lost a fair bit of weight recently (11bs to be exact) – I wasn’t fat before, but my wobbly bits wobbled a lot more than they do now,, and I’ve tried to lose weight before so it’s not as if I couldn’t afford to lose it! The thing is, when I’ve tried diets in the past, I’ve lost a few pounds in the beginning and then spent the rest of the time HUNGRY! Recently though I have just lost my appetite, and the weight has dropped off me. I’m not starving myself or anything stupid and I actually FORCE myself to eat when I’m not feeling hungry because I know I need to keep my energy levels up!

Anyway, I went to the doctor today for a couple of reasons … firstly I’ve noticed a mole on the back of my neck that is itchy, so she has recorded the measurements of it on my records … and secondly to mention about my loss of appetite. She measured and weighed me … and then pronounced me absolutely perfect for my height!!

It was a phenomenal thing to hear! For somebody who has struggled with weight issues her whole life to be told that your body IS in fact “perfect” … well it was a nice ego boost put it that way! My weight is bang slap in the middle of the ideal weight for my height, my body fat percentage is okay, my BMI is okay and I am looking better than I have looked in years! I have to admit though that I do still have huge body image issues but that is an on going battle!

Still, she was concerned about my loss of appetite so sent me off for blood tests. I HATE having blood tests … not because I’m scared of needles or anything like that (although who LIKES being poked with a needle! LOL) but because my veins are nonexistant (and I mean nonexistant!!) The nurse had two attempts to stab me before calling the doctor in to do it!!!

Sooo butchered and bruised … the blood results are back in a week!

Tag you’re it

4 09 2008

I was tagged by Jean at Not Super Mum Tagging is a bit like Chinese Whispers with questions! Someone “tags” you from their blog with a set of questions or something to ponder … and you then tag someone else!!

Here goes!

1. Where was I 10 years ago? Ooooh oooh I know the answer to that almost exactly!! Megan was a 6 week old baby and we had all moved in with my parents temporarily while we looked for somewhere to rent. They were away on a 6 week holiday to the USA and by the time they got back we were moving out. So yep this is exactly where I was 10 years ago … with a teeny weeny tiny baby and moving house!

2. What’s on my to do list today? Actually an awful lot. I need to get into the workshop and finish off the orders that I have in at the moment. I did all the prep last night so it’s only about two hours work which is why I’m not in a hurry to get there just yet (till I’ve had another coffee anyway!!) I then need to shrink wrap and label a ton of votive candles, reply to a gazillion emails and get back home in time to get at least an hours worth of accounts done while I have an empty house before I pick the kids up! After that … housework, get dinner ready, get kids in bed and back to working on the website this evening! Yeah that should do it!

3. What if I was a billionaire? I have thought about this a lot and the most important thing in the world to me is security and a roof over my head that I know is mine. I would buy the house of my dreams and decorate it entirely to my own tastes and live happily in it for ever after! I would make absolutely sure that all of my friends and family were financially secure for the rest of their lives too… and I’d give as much as I could do the charities that really deserve it to help other people. It would be nice to know that I could help to make the world a better place.

4. Five Places I have lived – My parents first house was in Shoreham, Sussex. I don’t remember much about the house except really scary carpets and a black & white tiled floor in the kitchen because I walked into the glass door and I remember how bright red my blood looked on the kitchen floor (I was 6 years old and still have a scar on my forehead!) We then moved to the house in Lancing that my mum still has. I grew up in this house until I was 16 and moved in with a boyfriend. I moved quite a few times with that boyfriend until we split up and I got my own bedsit. This was I think – my favourite place out of all the places I ever lived because it was all MINE! I had no money, could barely afford the rent let alone any food, but it was ALL MINE!! After that I met Hub, moved to Cornwall (err I think that’s more than five already!) then we came back up to Lancing and have lived in two places since that move.

5. Three bad habits I have – Only three? I smoke, I drink, I crack my knuckles! LOL That’s what I’m admitting to anyway!

6. Snacks I like – I don’t really tend to snack … if I am hungry I will eat something!! But, if I need a lil boost then it’s something like a banana or a piece of cheese.

7. Who am I tagging? I’ll have to update this in a bit … I really should get to work! LOL